shag... back ache... think need tranxene again... well at least tml took leave... but no rest... time to see grandmom... maybe head down to see dad also... long time no see him le... miss him alot... good side is i get to see dar tml from aftn... kekekeke... missing him already even if though he fetched me from work just now... *blush.. wats wrong with me...*lately keep over thinking things... about him.... i just dun get it... ima stubborn, bad tempered, spoilt(in a way), narrow minded at times... why of all ppl he pick me... and this isnt the main qus anyway... tat day actually wanna ask him de... but in the car i keep gagging... and the things he said... made me gagged even more... dunno why i keep thinking of such things..... i dun think its about being insecure... itsa more of.... finding out wats in his mind... wat was he thinking back then... why does he make tat decision... thinking back... maybe to him itsa normal... but kinda sudden for me....
another stupid issue in my mind... as usual... bio clock ticking.... faster now... kinda even MORE emo when i hear frs or relatives getting married.... i dun hav much time left... i got alot of things to plan... alot of things tat needs time.... and ima nearing 30... hello~~!!! dun wish to be an overage bride or mom!!~~ but as usual again.... cant do much.... so... just silently wait and see how it goes ba...
having mixed feelings... i hav the feeling tat i always wanna be with him.. i cant stand being alone... just need him by my side... just wanna wake up everyday and see his face first thing in the morn... yet i sometimes feels distant... maybe cos thinking diff ba... priorities diff ba... but nth is perfect lor... just hav to slowly work things out ba....
130am... time to slp... slp early wake up early can see him early le...
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